balance

Obsession Versus Neglect: How to Find the Right Self-Care Balance

A sweet woman once approached me after a seminar to ask, “How can we know when we have found the right balance between obsession and neglect of our bodies?”

 

She found herself wanting to make changes to her health and although she was doing well, she was so obsessed with making sure she got her time in at the gym that she was really struggling with everything else.

 

She was seeing results, but for some reason, she still wasn’t very happy. She was checking off her workouts, but she teared up as she mentioned other areas of her life she felt were being neglected. She was doing everything she thought she should be doing but still felt out of balance.

 

How do we know when we’re doing “enough”? How do we know when we’re not doing “enough”? Where is the balance between obsession with our health and complete neglect?

 

This really is an incredible question. I’m guessing you’ve found yourself on one side or the other at certain times in your life.

 

How do you know where your balance is? How do you find it?

 

Might I suggest that balance is not a destination, it’s a journey.

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Finding balance is about making changes each day that align with your values, your desires. It about different priorities in different seasons of life.

 

I’ve put together the following 5 questions that will help you understand your goals, your priorities, and help you find your own unique balance.

 

Because, what works well for one person, is not the same for another person.

 

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

 

What do you want for your health right now? Instead of focusing on a weight loss number or dress size, go deeper. What do you really want? What does “healthy” mean for you? What does it look like? What does it feel like?

 

Paint your picture of your ideal health.


 

WHAT IS REALISTIC?

 

Now, take a look at your picture of your ideal health. Is it a realistic goal? What kinds of changes would you have to make in your life right now to take steps toward that goal? Are those changes realistic for you? Do you have the tools you need to be successful? What barriers might get in your way and how will you overcome them?

 

Take a minute to ask yourself what is most realistic for you to achieve.


 

WHAT SEASON OF LIFE ARE YOU IN RIGHT NOW?

 

Different seasons of life bring about different self care opportunities. If you’re not sleeping through the night because of younger children, maybe a high intensity morning gym routine is not ideal as you’re already feeling like you’re not getting the proper rest and recovery.

 

Is time to yourself very limited? How can you get the most bang for your buck when it comes to fitness and nutrition? You used to be able to crush an hour gym session, but right now, what could work for you at this stage instead?

 

Maybe you do have a little extra time to yourself! Are you spending that extra time getting more movement in? Do you have a little more time to prepare meals during the day while your kids are at school?

 

Think about the season of life you’re in right now and make adjustments as needed. Every season brings about different opportunities and different challenges. It’s not about blaming your circumstances, but rather finding opportunity in each one.


 

WHAT ARE YOUR PRIORITIES?

 

What is most important to you right now? What things make you feel most fulfilled during the day? Make a list of some of your top priorities. Make sure your actions and your focus is on those top things.

 

Remember, priorities change. That’s ok. What things do you want to make sure you’re taking care of and paying attention to right now in this season of life? How can you incorporate your own self care into those priorities?


 

WHAT ARE YOUR NON-NEGOTIABLES?

 

Lastly, what is on your must-do list? Choose 2-3 things that nothing gets in the way of you accomplishing. These are your non-negotiables.

 

Protect these non-negotiables with your life. Schedule them, block out time, whatever you need to do to accomplish them.

 

These items should leave you feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. They are not another item to check off the list, but instead essential to feeling fulfilled and balanced.

 

Finding balance is tough. As mothers, it’s always a work in progress. Seasons in life change and so do our priorities, our goals, and our schedules.

 

Do the best you can with the stage of life you’re in right now. Make changes that are important to you. Accept the things you can’t change.

 

And most of all, practice gratitude for the amazing body you have no matter where you are right now. Find ways to treat yourself with respect and take care of yourself by giving it movement and nutrition that feel good to you.


 

Mindset Reset - How to Reset When Burnout Occurs

Do you ever find yourself putting so much action into your life that spirals out of control and eventually hit a wall mentally?

Perhaps you start to feel burnt out, or you start to question the action put forth because you feel like you’ve been on cruise control. Putting in the work is absolutely crucial for life, but something that may be even slightly more important is ensuring that your mental state is nourished and taken care of each day.

Creating a daily mindset ritual of some sort is more essential than I can even express in words because not having one can cause you to constantly have to do a mindset reset, which is what I’m going to discuss in detail. While mindset resets serve a great purpose; they are something that we don’t want to have to amount to quite often because we shouldn’t wait until things crumble to start taking care of ourselves.

However, being that we as women and mothers have a thousand things on our plate it may be helpful to understand what a mindset reset is and how to know when you need one.

A mindset reset is a combination of different tools and exercises that can be used to “start over” mentally. They can be done whenever you feel as though you’ve hit the wall and nothing you are doing is working. Mindset resets are great for taking time to look introspectively at your life to discover what’s not working from a clear mind.

The arsenal of tools and resources you use to refresh your mind is totally up to you and should consist of things that make you feel good deep down. It is important to listen to your intuition and let it guide you to what those things are instead of simply doing things you think you “should” do.

 

MINDSET RESET IDEAS

  1. EFT or Tapping - According to The Tapping Solution, “Tapping provides relief from chronic pain, emotional problems, disorders, addictions, phobias and more.” It is surprising how effective this simple exercise can be. You can find free videos on YouTube. My personal favorite is Brad Yates because he has quick versions of his normal tapping videos and we all know we could maximize our time as women and mothers.

  2. Light Exercise - Taking long walks with your little one can serve as a great way to clear your head when doing all the things finally catches up. It can be a wonderful time to disconnect, listen to an inspirational book and get back to basics.

  3. High Vibe Music Playlist - Listening to music that gets me back into a higher vibration always helps. I have created several playlists on YouTube that allow me to get back in the swing of things whenever I am feeling down.

  4. Celebration Exercise - Something we don’t do enough of as women and mothers is celebrate our small accomplishments. I recently purchased a journal and set time aside once a week to write down what I’m celebrating that week. It has already had significant impacts on my mindset and I can’t wait to see how helpful it proves to be as I continue to do it.

  5. Sleep - Of course it can be difficult to get enough sleep with little ones, but it is important to at least try. I’ve noticed when I am tired that my mind likes to play little tricks on me. I tell myself stories that are not real, but when I am well-rested it could be a stormy day and I feel the sun is shining bright!

 

These are just an example of some activities you can incorporate into your mindset reset ritual, but it’s important to develop a routine that works for you. That’s why I am including my free Mindset Reset Ritual Worksheet so you can create one of your own!

 

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Bio: Gabby is a Time Management Mentor & Biz Strategist for Mompreneurs. She supports mompreneurs in creating 3+ hours a day so they can stop struggling and FINALLY balance baby AND biz. She's passionate about helping mompreneurs create time to accomplish all the things that light them up and make them feel purposeful while serving as a positive example of what living your ideal mom life can provide.

To learn more about her visit www.gabbybogan.com and be sure to sign up for her FREE mini-Masterclass to learn how to kiss mommy guilt goodbye for good, the first step in maximizing time as a mompreneur!